Self-Esteem Trophies

Anyone involved in rec soccer, or any rec sports, will know what I am talking about. Here we are, nearing the end of US98 Soccer's (www.us98soccer.com) Fall 2008 Champions League Season, and I have purchased Cup Trophies for the winnners of the U-14, U-10, and U-8 divisions. Individual medals for the member of each Championship team. Awards for the "Golden Boot" and "Brick Wall" (Best Defender) for each age group. And individual "Golden Boot" and "Gold Brick" medals for each age group (U-6 to U-14). On top of that, every player in every age group gets a Certificate of Participation.

Still, I have parents wanting to buy Trophies for every member of their team, regardless of attendance at training and matches, and despite the fact that there are quite frankly undeserving kids who will be awarded for doing nothing or next to nothing.

All I can do is shake my head, and plead that they not go down that route.

Perspectives?

 

I think its OK in some circumstances. IMO, there are two factors to consider:
1 - age (you mentioned age groups from U6 to U14)
2 - rec v competitive environment

I think for 6 or 7 year olds, what the hell...give 'em all a trophy and keep 'em coming back. At the other end of the spectrum (i.e., for 14-year-olds), I agree with you. Rewards should be earned to be meaningful.

...where is the line drawn? At what age do you stop giving trophies to everyone? I dunno. I think kids are mature enough by age 8 or 9 to appreciate and accept the idea of rewarding the hard work and skill of only the best among them.

 

The deciding factor in any decision involving youth soccer is "Does it nurture their love of the game." If every administrator/coach used this premise, they and the game would be better for it.

 

Hmmmm......Christian, you don't want to share the awards with the undeserving and innocent, very contrary to your political views. Ok enough, just messing with you.

Being a Dad with a couple of kids in those leagues and having coached the under 6's before, I think any player in the under 10's and below should get a trophy for the very reasons stated above. They still see at is something to posses for playing the game. As you know, some kids don't show up because of their parents, you wouldn't want to discourage them from continueing to play by not getting the reward they look forward to I think. I think at 10 and above, the kids can appreciate that the trophies go to the teams and players who played the best. I think my 8 year old would probably get that now but would take it harder if she saw others getting them, which is good and bad all at the same time. I'm sure at the end of the day, you'll do what seems right. Good luck on it.

 

Once again RR comes to my rescue so I dont have to be the 'bad guy'.

If all the parents on a U-9 or under team want to give out participation trophies, so what. Age above that... no.

Time to start learning life's realities. Unless we're talking about minorities, of course. That's different. They're victims.

 

When I was a kid, I played in a catholic school league. Everyone got a trophy, but the winners got a bigger trophy. I think this might be that way to do it. This way no one feels left out, but the winners are actually rewarded.

 

I find much of the above statement and the information on the organizations website to be contradictory.

Pieces of paper for some and trophies for those with skills and abilities does not support this mission statement.

Trophies for only the winners and outstanding players does not support the winning is secondary directive.

I am all for competition and I am not against bigger trophies for the winners or indiviual awards for excellence but if the organization is truly trying to foster the love of the game then a particpation medal or trophy does not seem out of line. I sometimes forget that what I as an adult see as a trivial matter is sometimes terribly important to a child. Katie still has her first participation medal from travel soccer. It is important to her. The rest of them only God knows where they are.

Contrary to some of the above opionions I hope there is still room in this world for showing appreciation for someones effort. I bet all of you still appreciate a compliment when you go the extra mile especially when you are trying to learn or accomplish something new. Try to keep in mind that some of those U-12's and U-14's are first year players too.

 

RE: Re: Self-Esteem Trophies

Funny, I read the Mission Statement and Goals, and see "compete" and "respect for winning" in bold just as clearly as anything else.

US98 Soccer does not beat any of the children who do not compete or win or become more involved or better players, but we do provide an award for them earning a championship and for showing an aptitude, commitment, and accomplishments above and beyond.

Sorry BP, maybe it is just me, but I don't see the contradiction.

 

RE: Re: Self-Esteem Trophies

That is the first thing you have ever posted that I have found insulting to my intelligence. I highlighted both the "compete" and "respect for winning" parts and understand them completely. I did note that I am all for bigger trophies for the winners and rewards for excellence.

As for the contradiction, if you don't see it so be it but the directive itself says winning should be secondary.

 

RE: Re: Self-Esteem Trophies

And winning is secondary, but it does not mean it has to go unnoticed or unrewarded.

 

RE: Re: Self-Esteem Trophies

By the way, what is wrong with Certificates versus Trophies. It accomplishes the same thing, no?

Why must I contribute to what one psychologist termed "trophy creep" just because we are so fearful that a child's self-esteem will not be super-validated?

It's a discussion that escalates and gets heated very quickly, because it is about young kids. But I am glad to have everyone's perspective. I just don't think I can come around to the idea of everyone getting an award, earned or not.

Whatever happened to the idea that a child continues to play a sport because...........they like it.

 

Re: RE: Re: Self-Esteem Trophies

Please re-read my statement becasue nothing said that it should.

 

RE: Re: Self-Esteem Trophies

Christian nobody said you shouldn't reward winners. Just don't exclude the undeserved kids as you called them, I find calling children undeserved a little callous but...... That is not very liberal of you. Give the younger ones trophies and try to be kind when you reach out for advice and what you get back is not exactly what you wanted to hear. Next time folks just won't respond.

 

RE: Re: Self-Esteem Trophies

I'm sorry, what is wrong with Participation Certificates?

There is a difference between deserving a memento for showing up, and deserving an award for accomplishment. At least in my book.

And who exactly is getting back not exactly what they want to hear? I appreciate all the persepctives and said as much. But I would like to think I can provide my opinion as well on this subject, without anyone taking it personally.

 

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No it does not. A certificate is not an award for participation because kids don't want a piece of paper unless they can exchange it for an ice cream, a piece of candy, or a toy. Next time your son does something worthy of acknowledging offer him a piece of paper that says congratualtions or a small piece of crap toy and see which one he chooses. Better yet think of every birthday card you got as a kid that didn't have money in it.

You don't have to but at least be honest about it. The organiztion lists participation in soccer as its primary objective yet the season ending awards tell the kids, parents and coaches that winning and not learning is the primary objective of the league. This award system is going to lead to coaches teaching winning tactics over individual skills. Congratulations you are now a proud supporter of the system that has led to the skill level of the USMNT.

Who deserves an award more? A kid who was already very good entering the season who wins the golden boot award or the kid that improved the most during the year?

That is a great idea. Maybe someone in the US should start a competitive soccer league where kids play because they love the sport and may never get an award of any kind. Who knows there may be thousands of kids who want to do that every weekend they possibly can. :roll:

 

RE: Re: Self-Esteem Trophies

Look, I think a lot of us were taken aback a little on this.

I definitely am in favor of letting the TEAM PARENTS decide whether to buy and give little participation trophies. They dont have to be anything more than a pot-metal ball on a block of wood.
Not to reward slacker participation but staying in till end of season and MORE - to incent playing the NEXT season.

- - - - - - -- - -
My own kid's story shows that a lackadaisical player can turn out to be a 'star' later. But he has to keep playing to get there at all.

He pretty much played according to how he felt like playing up until he was in 6th grade. That year there werent quite enough club players available at roster deadline to form a team in our area league. So at the same time, there was a Pee-Wee football program started {which took a few of those players from us} so my kid went out for that. He played tackle on both Off and Def line. One series he jumped offside three consecutive plays and when the coach got him on the side, he slapped him on the helmet with his clipboard.

That was some incentive! Both to be a better player on the football squad {they won the league, first year} AND from that time on, on the soccer field. His HS career saw him on 2nd team All Dayton. And that's a pretty well regarded soccer bunch.

But he was in the sixth grade and that worked. He wouldnt have given a shit about any participation trophy if they hadnt won something. He certainly did care about the several HS awards he won.

But he started when he was six, and those little kids all got 'something'.

 

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My 4 1/2 Years Old son's Certificate from the Spring Season sits on the middle of the dresser and he takes pride in it. I hope my son never feels that his self-esteem, self-worth, or interest or love of anything depends on receiving a shiny piece of plastic or metal.

BP, your perspective is....interesting. Thank you and please continue to provide it, seriously.

 

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My post was written before you wrote your follow up where you did say you appreciated people's opinion, so I stand corrected on your appreciation. Glad you wrote it.

I still think the youngsters should get trophies but that's just me.

 

RE: Re: RE: Re: Self-Esteem Trophies

Spencer, did you call Fox Fone-In last night?

 

Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Self-Esteem Trophies

Err no, why do you ask? Unfortunately I'm without FSC or the equivalent these days.